by Sophia Smith

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How Positive Thinking Can Change Your Life

How Positive Thinking Can Change Your Life

For a long time, I have been a slave to my own negative thoughts. I cannot imagine how many times I have held myself back and how many missed opportunities are on my regrets list. Many of mine friends were calling me foolish for not believing in myself or anything else, for that matter, and I thought they just do not realize the reality.

With some self-reflection, I have realized, however, that some people are born with “the glass is half full” attitude, while others need a certain dose of maturity, a breaking point or some self-teaching to fill up their half-empty glass.

Once I realized how much my attitude can affect my life flow, I made a firm decision to change it, and I am working on it each day.

How I encourage change in mindset on a daily basis.

  1. Learning to Be Thankful

    An important part of cultivating positive thinking is being aware of what you have and being thankful for that, so I start each day with my cup of coffee and a piece of paper and a pen. Every day I write down everything I am grateful for.

    I start with the little things, like “There was no rain yesterday”, “I found a free seat in public transport”, “My favorite cake”, “A colleague at work said I look beautiful today”, etc. After, I take some time to write down all “the big things” that make my life great, such as, “I have amazing family”, “My friends love me”, “I am healthy”…

  2. Changing the Perspective

    Sometimes, the whole world seems gray, but when you change your perspective, you will see that the sun is shining after all. I like to do that by talking with other people and understanding their point of view.

    Another way is by reading smart, well-written and illuminating books. I have read many of them, but the three that really had influence on my life are “The Magic” by Rhonda Byrne, “Who Will Cry When You Die” by Robin Sharma and “Thinking Fast and Slow” by Daniel Kahneman.

    When everything else fails I change perspective, by changing my surroundings. The everyday routine can really start to suffocate me, so I take a walk in the park, get a day off and go on a really short road trip, etc.

  3. Self-Improvement

    One of the things that got me the most depressed was the fact that I am getting old and that there is no more room for getting better. As I was exploring the possibilities of developing various forms of intelligence, I have learned that the brain can develop through life. I am practicing my verbal and emotional intelligence by reading often and participating in conversations. I draw and paint to improve my spatial intelligence, dance to improve my musical and physical intelligence, etc.

    I consider that logical intelligence is one of the most important, so I am dedicating a lot of time to it, by reading books dedicated to it, challenging myself to solve logical problems and playing a lot of games which require logical thinking, such as chess and online Sudoku games.

  4. Healthy Life – Positive Thoughts

    If there is anything I have realized in my journey towards positive thinking, it’s that eating hamburger and fries while binge watching a TV show, will not get me anywhere. On the contrary, it will only make me feel more negative.

    A healthy balanced diet, on the other side, is great for fueling the body. Physical activities, such as walking and exercising, are making me feel ready for all the challenges ahead. The most important message conveyed by a hard day workout is: “I can do it”.

A change in the mindset has drastically changed my entire life. Now, I feel more prepared for all the challenges ahead, and I truly believe that I can do it!

About the Author: Sophia Smith

Sophia is Australian based beauty, lifestyle and health blogger. She is very passionate about organic beauty products, healthy lifestyle and personal development. She is regular contributor at High Style Life.

Find her on Twitter, Facebook, and Google +

 

5 Comments

Derrick k

I really like your attitude towards life. It’s true that to make life more cheerful we need to change own surrounding, think positive.

Reply
Healthylife

People with a positive attitude are happier, more resilient, better decision-makers, and perform at a higher level than those with a negative attitude. People can attain positive attitude with these ideas.
Well done Sophia. I love your content. Keep up the good work.

Reply
Ben

This was very inspirational i lead a positive thinking group for mental health. This is a good example on what positive thinking is. I will use it in my group.

Reply
Paula

Positive attitude is life’s treasure! Coming from the heart instead of the head is more rewarding. When you come from love all things are possible. Share eveything you have and smile. The joy of giving will enhance your life. People will show up and enhance your life! Challenges are best handled by living in the mystery. Stay focused on the positive and fill your heart with love and then let go…watch what happens. .. Paula Biondo ~ Hilton Head Island Spa & Wellness. …

Reply
Arindam

I seriously want to know from your experience that is it really possible to let our dreams come true by having positive perspective towards that .
And how can i bring the love back into my life which is lost somewhere unknown

Reply

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karenyoung_heysigmund

Boundaries aren`t requests we make of them. They`re the actions we take to keep them (and everyone else involved) physically safe, relationally safe, and to preserve values when they aren`t able to.

The rule: Phones in the basket at 5pm.

The boundary: (What I`m going to do when you`re having trouble with the rule.)

`Okay - I can see you`re having trouble popping your phone in the basket. I`m just going to sit beside you as a reminder that it`s time. Take your time. I`ll just watch over your shoulder until you`re ready. So who are we texting? What are we watching?`

Or:

`I know you hate this rule. It`s okay to be annoyed. It`s not okay to yell. I`m not going to listen while you`re yelling.`

Then, `This phones in the basket thing is chewing into our night when we start it at 5pm. We`ll see how we go tomorrow and if it`s bumpy, we`ll shift to phones in the basket from 4:30pm. Let`s see how we go.`

It`s not a punishment or a threat. It`s also not about what they do, but about what we do to lead the situation into a better place.

Of course, this doesn`t always mean we`ll hold the boundary with a calm and clear head. It certainly doesn`t mean that. We`re human and sometimes we`ll lose our own minds as though they weren`t ours to own. Ugh. Been there too many times. That`s okay - this is an opportunity to model humility, repair, self-compassion. What`s important is that we repair the relational rupture as soon as we can. This might sound like, `I`m sorry I yelled. That must have been confusing for you - me yelling at you to stop yelling. Let`s try that again.`❤️

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Nov 18

Open
Boundaries aren't requests we make of them. They're the actions we take to keep them (and everyone else involved) physically safe, relationally safe, and to preserve values when they aren't able to. The rule: Phones in the basket at 5pm. The boundary: (What I'm going to do when you're having trouble with the rule.) 'Okay - I can see you're having trouble popping your phone in the basket. I'm just going to sit beside you as a reminder that it's time. Take your time. I'll just watch over your shoulder until you're ready. So who are we texting? What are we watching?' Or: 'I know you hate this rule. It's okay to be annoyed. It's not okay to yell. I'm not going to listen while you're yelling.' Then, 'This phones in the basket thing is chewing into our night when we start it at 5pm. We'll see how we go tomorrow and if it's bumpy, we'll shift to phones in the basket from 4:30pm. Let's see how we go.' It's not a punishment or a threat. It's also not about what they do, but about what we do to lead the situation into a better place. Of course, this doesn't always mean we'll hold the boundary with a calm and clear head. It certainly doesn't mean that. We're human and sometimes we'll lose our own minds as though they weren't ours to own. Ugh. Been there too many times. That's okay - this is an opportunity to model humility, repair, self-compassion. What's important is that we repair the relational rupture as soon as we can. This might sound like, 'I'm sorry I yelled. That must have been confusing for you - me yelling at you to stop yelling. Let's try that again.'❤️

karenyoung_heysigmund

Boundaries are about what WE do to preserve physical safety, relational safety, and values. They aren’t about punishment. They’re the consequences that make sense as a way to put everything right again and restore calm and safety.

When someone is in the midst of big feelings or big behaviour, they (as with all of us when we’re steamy) have limited capacity to lead the situation into a better place.

Because of this, rather than focusing on what we need them to do, shift the focus on what we can do to lead back to calm.

This might sound like:

The rule (what we want them to do): Phones go in the basket at 5pm.

The boundary (what we do when the rule is broken), with love and leadership: ‘I can see you’re having trouble letting go of your phone. That’s okay - I’m just going to sit beside you until you’re ready. Take your time. You’re not in trouble. I’ll just stay here and watch over your shoulder until you’re done.’

Or …

‘I can see this phones in the basket process is dragging out and chewing into our night when we start it at 5pm. If that keeps happening I’ll be starting this process at 4pm instead of 5pm.’

And if there’s a bit of spice in their response, part of being a reliable, sturdy leader is also being able to lead them through that. Even if on the inside you feel like you’re about to explode 🤯 (we’ve all been there), the posture is ‘I can handle this, and I can handle you.’ This might sound like,

‘Yep you’re probably going to have a bit to say about it. That’s okay - I don’t need you to agree with me. I know it’s annoying - and it’s happening.’

‘I won’t listen when you’re speaking to me like this. Take your time though. Get it out of you and then we can get on with the evening.’

Then, when the spicy has gone, that’s the time to talk about what’s happened. ‘You’re such a great kid. I know you know it’s not okay to talk to me like that. How are we going to put this right? Let’s yet 5pm again tomorrow and see how we go. If it causes trouble we’ll start earlier. I actually think we’ll be okay though.’♥️

View

Nov 10

Open
Boundaries are about what WE do to preserve physical safety, relational safety, and values. They aren’t about punishment. They’re the consequences that make sense as a way to put everything right again and restore calm and safety. When someone is in the midst of big feelings or big behaviour, they (as with all of us when we’re steamy) have limited capacity to lead the situation into a better place. Because of this, rather than focusing on what we need them to do, shift the focus on what we can do to lead back to calm. This might sound like: The rule (what we want them to do): Phones go in the basket at 5pm. The boundary (what we do when the rule is broken), with love and leadership: ‘I can see you’re having trouble letting go of your phone. That’s okay - I’m just going to sit beside you until you’re ready. Take your time. You’re not in trouble. I’ll just stay here and watch over your shoulder until you’re done.’ Or … ‘I can see this phones in the basket process is dragging out and chewing into our night when we start it at 5pm. If that keeps happening I’ll be starting this process at 4pm instead of 5pm.’ And if there’s a bit of spice in their response, part of being a reliable, sturdy leader is also being able to lead them through that. Even if on the inside you feel like you’re about to explode 🤯 (we’ve all been there), the posture is ‘I can handle this, and I can handle you.’ This might sound like, ‘Yep you’re probably going to have a bit to say about it. That’s okay - I don’t need you to agree with me. I know it’s annoying - and it’s happening.’ ‘I won’t listen when you’re speaking to me like this. Take your time though. Get it out of you and then we can get on with the evening.’ Then, when the spicy has gone, that’s the time to talk about what’s happened. ‘You’re such a great kid. I know you know it’s not okay to talk to me like that. How are we going to put this right? Let’s yet 5pm again tomorrow and see how we go. If it causes trouble we’ll start earlier. I actually think we’ll be okay though.’♥️

karenyoung_heysigmund

So ready to get started with ‘Hey Little Warrior’ in Melbourne. This is my fourth time this year presenting this workshop in Melbourne and we sell out every time.

So what do we do here?! We dive into how to support young children with anxiety. It’s my favourite thing to talk about. I love it. Even more than whether or not I want dessert. We talk about new ways to work with anxiety in littles so they can feel braver and bigger in the presence of it. This workshop is loaded with practical strategies. I love presenting this workshop.

(And yes - always yes to dessert. As if I would ever skip the most important meal of the day. Pffftt.)

@compass_australia

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Oct 27

Open
So ready to get started with ‘Hey Little Warrior’ in Melbourne. This is my fourth time this year presenting this workshop in Melbourne and we sell out every time. So what do we do here?! We dive into how to support young children with anxiety. It’s my favourite thing to talk about. I love it. Even more than whether or not I want dessert. We talk about new ways to work with anxiety in littles so they can feel braver and bigger in the presence of it. This workshop is loaded with practical strategies. I love presenting this workshop. (And yes - always yes to dessert. As if I would ever skip the most important meal of the day. Pffftt.) @compass_australia

karenyoung_heysigmund

They’re often called sensory preferences, but they’re sensory needs.

In our adult worlds we can move our bodies and ourselves to seek regulation. If we don’t like noise we’re less likely to be DJs for example. If we don’t love heights we’re less likely to be pilots or skydivers. If we feel overwhelmed, we can step outside, go into an office, go to the bathroom, or pop on headphones for a break. If we need to move, we can stand, walk to get a tea. At school, this is so much harder.

When bodies don’t feel safe, there will be anxiety. This will potentially drive fight (anger, tantrums), flight (avoidance, running away, movement), or shutdown (in quiet distress and can’t learn).

These are physiological issues NOT behavioural ones.

Whenever we can, we need to support physiological safety by accommodating sensory needs AND support brave behaviour. What’s tricky is disentangling anxiety driven by unmet sensory needs, from anxiety driven by brave behaviour.

The way through is to support their physiological needs, then move them towards brave behaviour.

Schools want to support this. They want all kids to be happy and the best they can be, but there will be a limit on their capacity to support this - not because they don’t want to, but because of a scarcity of resources.

There will often be many children with different physiological needs. Outside school there is nowhere else that has to accommodate so many individual needs, because as adults we won’t be drawn to environments that don’t feel okay. In contrast, school requires all kids to attend and stay regulated in the one environment.

For now, we don’t have a lot of options. Yes there are schools outside mainstream, and yes there is home school, but these options aren’t available to everyone.

So, until mainstream schools are supported with the resources (staff, spaces, small classes, less demand on curriculum … and the list goes on), what can we do?

- Help school with specific ways to support your child’s physiology while being mindful that teachers are also attending to the needs of 25+ other nervous systems. But be specific.
- Limit the list. Make this a ‘bare minimum needs’ list, not a ‘preferences’ one.♥️

View

Oct 20

Open
They’re often called sensory preferences, but they’re sensory needs. In our adult worlds we can move our bodies and ourselves to seek regulation. If we don’t like noise we’re less likely to be DJs for example. If we don’t love heights we’re less likely to be pilots or skydivers. If we feel overwhelmed, we can step outside, go into an office, go to the bathroom, or pop on headphones for a break. If we need to move, we can stand, walk to get a tea. At school, this is so much harder. When bodies don’t feel safe, there will be anxiety. This will potentially drive fight (anger, tantrums), flight (avoidance, running away, movement), or shutdown (in quiet distress and can’t learn). These are physiological issues NOT behavioural ones. Whenever we can, we need to support physiological safety by accommodating sensory needs AND support brave behaviour. What’s tricky is disentangling anxiety driven by unmet sensory needs, from anxiety driven by brave behaviour. The way through is to support their physiological needs, then move them towards brave behaviour. Schools want to support this. They want all kids to be happy and the best they can be, but there will be a limit on their capacity to support this - not because they don’t want to, but because of a scarcity of resources. There will often be many children with different physiological needs. Outside school there is nowhere else that has to accommodate so many individual needs, because as adults we won’t be drawn to environments that don’t feel okay. In contrast, school requires all kids to attend and stay regulated in the one environment. For now, we don’t have a lot of options. Yes there are schools outside mainstream, and yes there is home school, but these options aren’t available to everyone. So, until mainstream schools are supported with the resources (staff, spaces, small classes, less demand on curriculum … and the list goes on), what can we do? - Help school with specific ways to support your child’s physiology while being mindful that teachers are also attending to the needs of 25+ other nervous systems. But be specific. - Limit the list. Make this a ‘bare minimum needs’ list, not a ‘preferences’ one.♥️

karenyoung_heysigmund

Brave often doesn’t feel like ‘brave’. Most often, it feels like anxiety. If there is something brave, important, new, hard, there will always be anxiety right behind it. It’s the feeling of anxiety that makes it something brave - and brave is different for everyone.♥️

#anxietyawareness #childanxiety #anxietysupport #anxietyinkids #parent #positiveparenting

View

Oct 18

Open
Brave often doesn’t feel like ‘brave’. Most often, it feels like anxiety. If there is something brave, important, new, hard, there will always be anxiety right behind it. It’s the feeling of anxiety that makes it something brave - and brave is different for everyone.♥️ #anxietyawareness #childanxiety #anxietysupport #anxietyinkids #parent #positiveparenting

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