Separation Anxiety Webinar

Strengthening Children Through Separation Anxiety

Separation anxiety can come with loads of heartache for children and their important adults, but there’s something else it comes with – the opportunity to strengthen all children against anxiety and build their brave – and we know they can be brave.

Saying ‘goodbye’ can be tough! Not only for our children, but for us too – even the strongest and bravest of parenting hearts can feel the wrenching that can come at separation. Separation anxiety exists for a good reason. We want our children to feel loved and supported, and we also want to build their brave so anxiety doesn’t stand in the way of the important, growthful things they need to do.

Of course we’d rather our young ones never feel the tailwhip of separation anxiety, but so many young people (and the adults who love them) are going to experience anxiety at separation from a loved one. It’s part of being human, but it doesn’t have to hurt. As their important adult, you have a profound capacity to support them through separation anxiety and help them feel braver, stronger, and closer to you, even when you’re not beside them – at school, at bedtime – any time they are away from you. In this one-and-a-half-hour webinar, we will explore practical, powerful ways to do this.

This is information I wish every parent could have. I’ll be speaking to you from my professional experience, but more importantly, I’ll be speaking to you from my parenting heart. Something you might not know about me is that my own experience with my daughter’s separation anxiety when she was a little person is what led me to this work. (She’s now one of the bravest women I know!

I know we can get kids through separation anxiety. I know the heartache. I know the feelings of helplessness. And I know we can get them through. 

If you can’t make the ‘live’ online event, that’s no problem at all. A recording of the webinar will be made available to all registered participants for 30 days.

We will explore:

  • why separation anxiety happens, and the important job it’s there to do;
  • the thing all loving adults will do (we’ll all do them!) that can inadvertently make their anxiety worse, and what to do instead;
  • why their anxiety will fuel yours;
  • what adults can do to soften the impact of separation;
  • how to respond in the midst of anxiety – strategies for children, parents and carers (including teachers and other important adults);
  • practical ways to support your child through separation anxiety;
  • specific strategies for bedtime anxiety;
  • the toolbox for young people – how to help all children feel bigger at separation;
  • the connection between anxiety and aggression, and how to respond to big behaviour in the moment;
  • the connection between anxiety, behaviour and learning, and how to work with this;
  • a road map for supporting your child through anxiety – before, during, and after;
  • why relationships matter, and how to facilitate relationships between children and their important adults (teachers, other important adults) in ways that will build brave behaviour.
Presented by: Karen Young (AUS)
Location: Online
Start Time: 6:30 pm
End Time: 8:30 pm
Cost: AUD $40
Date: 08/02/2024
Timezone: Brisbane GMT +10

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We don’t need the last word. We don’t need them to agree.

When there is a power struggle - we want … they want … we’re trying to convince them … they’re trying to convince us … - leave power on the table. It’s already yours because you’re the grown-up. You don’t need to convince them, and nothing they can do or say (or don’t do or say) will change that.

The presence they are looking for is an anchor presence - love + leadership - strong, steady, grounded and able to care for them through the storm.

Anchors don’t stop working when the storm hits. During the storm, they work harder to hold on and keep things safe. They don’t take things personally and they don’t judge their performance on how well or how quickly they can stop the storm. 

It doesn’t matter if our kiddos don’t see things our way. They’re looking through a different lens - one that can’t always see around corners the way we might be able to. They don’t have the same resources, experiences, or skills as us. Neither did we at their age.

We’re in charge of keeping them, others, and their relationship with us safe. They’re in charge of how they respond.

It’s why boundaries have to be about what we do - because it’s all we can control.

Sometimes an anchor presence means recognising that we can’t stop the storm, and we don’t need to.

When they don’t have the skills or resources to do what we would like them to do in the moment, we do what we can do to keep the moment safe, while letting them know we are here for them.

If they’re hurting a sibling, we move the sibling away, and stay in connection while we do. ‘It’s okay to be angry. I won’t let you hurt their body (while we’re physically moving their sibling - that’s the boundary). I’m right here (relationship).’

Or if they’re yelling: ‘I want to hear what you want. I care about you much to listen when you’re saying those things about me. (Boundary - I’m not listening.) 

Or, ‘You might stay angry with me for a while and that’s okay. I’m here when you want to talk about it, but I won’t listen while you’re yelling at me. Take your time. You’re not in trouble.’♥️
Mattering is about feeling valued and feeling like I’m doing something that adds value. It doesn’t have to come from grades or schoolwork, and for so many kids it probably won’t. There are so many ways to help kids feel seen and valued that have nothing to do with schoolwork, but which can work to engage them in schoolwork. Little things make a big difference. 

We also have to let our teachers know how much the matter. They are the greatest key to ‘mattering’ (or unmattering) in our schools and for our young people.♥️
If we want to meet their learning needs, we first have to meet their relational ones. If we want them to be open to learning, they first have to open to the adult they are learning from - and they won’t be open if they don’t feel seen, safe, and cared for. It’s not always easy, it’s just how it is.♥️
You know what's lovely? Aside from Sundays and sunshine? …
Sales. 

You know what's even lovelier?
Sales that are 25% off books and resources designed to help kiddos feel bigger, braver, and calmer.

For a short time, we’re taking 25% off books, plushies, courses, posters, and a bunch of tiny treasures that can help build courage and calm in kids and teens.

With the end of the financial year just around the corner, it’s the perfect time to top up your toolkit — or quietly replace those resources that have shimmied away while you weren’t looking. (We see you. We've been there.)

This one is for you. And the young ones in your life. Actually, this one is for everyone.

Happy shopping!

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