One little brave step at a time. It doesn’t matter how big the steps are, or how long it takes as long as the steps are forward.
The steps won’t always feel gentle. The big feelings that come with this won’t hurt them, as long as they are safe and they aren’t alone in their distress. Lead, with love. ‘I know this feels big, and I know you can do this. I’m right here with you. We’ll handle this together.’
It doesn’t have to be you who is with them, as long as it is someone they feel safe with and care about by - a teacher, a relative, a grandparent - any important adult in their lives who can help them feel seen, loved, and safe through the storm.♥️
Darling you did it! It’s been a huge 4 years - the worst of days and the best of days - and you did it. I’m so proud of the woman you are and the woman you’ve been through all of it.
The world is opening up to you, and I can’t wait to see where it takes you. I’m so excited for your career. You belong here my darling, and the path is widening to take you.
Now is your time to rest and play. You’ve earned it. And when the next part of your adventure begins, the Masters part, know that we will be here beside you and behind you, but of course never in front of you. Your path is yours to take and you have everything in you to get there. Know that we’ll be here with our arms wide open, with hugs, with chats, with snacks, with dogs, with Aperols, and of course, with late night drive-throughs when nothing else makes sense. We’re here. I’m here. In fact, it’s one of my favourite places to be.♥️
‘Yeah, that feels big doesn’t it. I get that. So if you can’t to the whole thing/ the whole time/ all of it, tell me what you can do. And don’t tell me nothing, because that’s not an option.’♥️
Are they relationally safe? - Do they have an anchor adult at school? - Do they know how to access this adult? - Do they feel welcome, a sense of belonging, warmth from their adults?
Do they feel safe in their bodies? - Are they able to move their bodies when they need to? - Are they free from sensory overload or underload? - If not, what is their bare minimum list to achieve this with minimum disruption to the class, keeping in mind that when they feel safer in their bodies, there will naturally be less disruptive behaviour and more capacity to engage, learn, regulate.
Then we ask the question of them:
What`s one little step you can take? And don`t tell me nothing because I know that you are amazing, and brave, and capable. I`m here right beside you to show you how much. I believe in you, even if you don`t believe in yourself enough yet.❤️