You know the feeling. It’s a ‘knowing’ or at the very least a gentle persuasion that something is off, or awesome, or needs our attention. It’s subtle and doesn’t clamour for attention, which is why it’s easily missed.
It’s intuition, and like most things that speak with a quiet voice, if we listen the potential is life-changing.
For a long time, intuition was dismissed by science as pseudo-science – sort of science but not really. Really! Fortunately for all of us, science is now on board and researchers have found the part of the brain where intuition does its brilliant best.
Intuition: We’ve all heard of it, but what is it?
Researchers at Leeds University analysed a hefty pile of research papers on intuition. They concluded that intuition is a very real psychological process where the brain uses past experiences and cues from the self and the environment to make a decision. The decision happens so quickly that it doesn’t register on a conscious level.
Intuition exists in all of us, whether we acknowledge it or not. The more we can learn about it, the more we can use it to shape our lives for the better.
The human brain has two ‘operating systems’. The first is quick, instinctual and effortless. This is where our intuition lies. Intuition works by drawing on patterns collected by our experience and when we have to make a quick decision about whether something is real, fake, feels good, feels bad, right or wrong, we draw on these patterns. It all happens ‘offline’, outside our conscious awareness.
The second operating system is slower to respond. It’s more analytical and deliberate and it’s conscious.
The Evidence
Science has found real evidence to support the existence of intuition. There are plenty of studies, but let’s talk about one in particular – because it’s a good one. This particular study showed how the intuitive part of our brain knows the right answer long before the more analytical part.
In this study, participants played a card game which, unknown to the participants, was rigged from the beginning. Participants had to choose from one of two decks of cards. One was rigged to provide big wins, then big losses. The other – small gains but hardly any losses.
The participants reported that after 50 cards, they had a hunch about which deck was safer. After 80 they were able to explain the difference between the two decks. But here’s where it gets interesting – after only 10 cards, the sweat glands on on the palms of their hands opened whenever they took from the dangerous deck. It was about then that participants started to prefer the safer deck but there was no conscious awareness that this was happening. So, before the analytical part of their brain knew what was going on, the subjects’ intuition guided them towards a better decision.
Sharpening Your Intuition
Every person on the planet has intuition but not every person listens chooses to listen to it.
Intuition is the way the subconscious mind communicates with the conscious mind. The information that informs ‘that feeling’ is real. It’s like any other decision but the workings of it – the collection, the storage, the putting together – happen outside of our conscious mind.
So intuition is a brilliant thing. The sharper it is, the better off you’ll be. Here’s how to feed yours so it’s flourishing and ready to advise …
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Shhh. Listen.
It’s sounds simple enough – and it is. No tricks here. Your intuition can’t talk to you if you’re not listening. When you start to take notice, good things will happen. Just try it and see.
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Trust your gut feeling.
When a word like ‘gut’ teams up with a word like ‘feeling’, you know there has to be a good reason. And there is. Research suggests that emotion and intuition have a physical presence in our gut. The gut is lined with a network of neurons and is often referred to as the ‘second brain.’ It’s known as the enteric nervous system (ENS) and it contains about 100 million neurons, which is more than the spinal chord and peripheral nervous system but less than the brain. This is why we get ‘sick’ about having to make a tough decision or knowing we’ve made a bad one.
[irp posts=”1021″ name=”The Rules for Being Human”]
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Feel.
You’ll know your intuition is there because you’ll be able to feel it – if you let yourself. You’ll feel it in your belly and it will goosebump your skin, send a shiver down your spine, race your heart and quicken your breath. Sometimes it’s even more subtle and the only way to describe it as a ‘knowing’. You’ll feel when something is right – it will feel clear, nourishing and enriching. And you’ll feel when something is off – for me it’s an ache or a flattening. Trusting your intuition might be difficult at first if you’re not used to it, but give it time and trust it bit by bit, if that feels better. It will be worth it.
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Be ready to let bad feelings go.
Negative emotions wil cloud intuition, which is why when you’re angry or depressed bad decisions can happen so easily. Research has backed this, finding that people made better intuitive choices in a word task when they were in a positive mood as compared to when they were in a negative mood.
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Be deliberate about the people you hang on to.
People who drain you will add to the noise and make it more difficult to hear what your intuition wants you to hear. Chances are that you already know how they are. If not, be still for a moment – your intuition will be trying to tell you. Keep people who enrich and empower you and walk away from those who drain you. Understandably, you can’t always walk away from the troublesome ones and if that’s the case, empower yourself by making it your decision to stay, rather than not theirs because they’ve taken your choice. The difference is subtle in language but big in impact. One lets the power stay with you, one gives it over to them.
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Pay attention to what’s going on around you.
The more information you are able to gather from the environment, the more the intuitive, subconscious part of your brain has to work with – and the more accurately it will inform your decisions.
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Connect with others.
There are so many things that inform our opinions and decisions other than speech. Tone, volume of speech, body language, gestures – they all contribute to the meaning we give to our interactions with people. Sometimes, we have a feeling about people but can’t quite put a finger on what it is. People might seem distant, distracted, uninterested, and often these aren’t spoken but are ‘picked up’ through in different ways. The ability to pick up on the thoughts, feelings and intentions of others is referred to as ‘empathic accuracy’. The more time we spend with people, the more we can finely tune or empathic accuracy. Being able to pick on the signals of others will all add to intuition.
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Find time to be silent and still.
Having solitude turns down the clamour of the world and allows you to tune in to your intuition. Our intuition is always sending warnings and encouragement but often we are too busy to notice. Let your mind wander and be open to what comes to you – feelings, thoughts or words. One of the ways to do this is through mindfulness. By focusing your thoughts on your own experience in the present moment, mindfulness gets rid of mental clutter and makes way for you to connect with your intuition.
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Use your dream time well.
Dreams are the brain’s way of processing information that’s left over from the day. They are rich with valuable data – experiences, memories, learnings – so they can work hard if we let them. Paying attention to dreams can provide information that we may not have access due when we are awake. Before you fall asleep, turn your thoughts to any unresolved issues or problems. Think about possible options or resolutions as you’re falling asleep. Close your eyes and let your brain do the rest.
But of course …
Intuition is powerful and can lead to amazing insights, but that doesn’t mean you follow it blindly. It’s still important to use common sense and a balance of rationality. You need a balance of both – call into play both the intuitive and rational parts of the brain to position yourself to reach the best decisions.
Well very interesting but way off track
Unfortunately
I think you like all those before you
Where born and then instinctualy conditioned in all aspects of life including beleiveing the ROAD that you started on was correct.
But unfortunately it was not, so the answers
Do not add up, they all just hit a brick wall.
And sadly invented drugs to stupefy the people.
And saying this is the answer to the equation, and if this is true then what is it.
I broke through those barriers and found the only true equation to knowing these answers.
L.J.M.
Two experiences came via dream. I had a dream that my brother was stranded with a flat tire. Several days later, my brother’s car was parked outside our mom’s house on the rim. The second is when I had a dream that my mom’s unemployed was approved. I went into my mom’s room and told her about my dream. I told her to check her account. Her claim was approved for benefits! Lastly, was via audio. This was a voice or English but I could understand perfectly. The warning told me that there was about to be a shooting. I told everyone that someone is about to begin shooting. Several moments later, a shooting occurred at the gas station. Everyone asked how did I know that the shooting would happen. I replied that I felt it. Feel free to comment what you think.
The other day my sister left the house late at night. I was thinking about how my mom would probably be upset that she left so late and then heard a voicemail play in my head. “Weird”, I thought then decided to text my sister if she had just called someone and they didn’t pick up. She said yes and honestly I was in shock because I didn’t think it was connected. I told her I didn’t think it was a good idea for her to leave but I felt it was a sign but didn’t know what kind of sign. She came back home the next day safely but I can’t help but ponder if that was the right thing I was supposed to say to her or why that thought came to me.
You where worried about your sister
And when you reacted to that you rang
And remember it’s telling you say what you need to say to your sister like I worry about you becouse I love you
As you need to tell everyone everytime you feel this way
You are very loving and caring let that out and feel the spiritual being
Superb, it shows your connection with self
Hi Karen,
I am respectfully disagreeing with the letting people go point (leaving out abusive cases of course).
Certainly, it’s a coming of age moment that your friend circles change over time but I wouldn’t encourage this generation that leaving people behind is the way to go when you notice yourself being irritated by them. These are the feelings you can then emphasize on and grow from truly. Otherwise, you’ll stay superficial in your being and all the other points you made will not be reached. So I see irritations as moments to learn from instead. Regards Neil
I have always known I have had high intuition since I around 10 years old. The biggest one was a few weeks ago. I had my neice over to my house, and she asked to sleepover. I told her she would have to get her fathers permission. She texted her father, and he did not respond. So, a few hours later I texted him. No responce. Then a few hours later I had threurge to text to ask if he was ok. Finally at around 10:30 his sister called me, and said there was a family emergency. They were coming to pick her up. I went outside to smoke, and calm myself. He has a criminal history, but at this time they said a family emergency. Not that he was having the emergency. I knew he was having heart issues. I immediately thought he is in jail, or hosptial with heart issues. These oprions did not feel right. I was urged from inside to see if there were any shootings in MN that night, and even called the hospital to check. The hospital said they did not have a person by that name, but inside I knew he was the one shot and killed from what I found on google. My bf said no, there are millions of ppl in MN that is not him. I said yes it is! I am sure of it. He was shot and killed that night. Bf asked if I was psyhic.
Am real happy to read the content it heals my soul
It heals my soul too.
I have been practicing this for a few months now but I’m curious if you or someone could help me with one question; how do you know to trust it’s your intuition guiding you from reoccurring past situations or just something you want to believe? Do we just acknowledge the past reoccurrences and let go to trust whatever happens happens? Since every situation can be different and not follow old patterns.
According to my understanding, as far as intuition is good to have, you can’t follow it blindly.
And many factors make up our intuition, some people have a very bad intuition while others good. But the main point is how we train it and being mindful. Mindfulness is a very important factor in determining whether intuition is right or not. If you’re not mindful of things you do from the onset, your intuition maybe not be the best to follow in some aspects. Similar to what you believe in too, you train it with intuition and it goes in line with it. That when you’re about to do something that contradicts your training, you have a feeling right there.
What about conflicting feelings? If I leave a situation that feels draining for certain reasons, or from certain people, yet I still get the ache you describe from a bad decision?
I met a lady today for a job/paid hobby I do, she asked to reduce my price on my booking page and pay cash and my gut instinct immediately started feeling off. I’ve never felt this way before but this particular person set off my internal alarm bells. I’m wondering if you have any insight as to why that could be and if I’m potentially overreacting or I should definitely be listening when they’re such strong negative vibes towards the situation
it is absolutely correct that, our body will react to feelings…
It seems to me your gut was giving you a clear warning, like an alarm about that person/situation.
I would trust that!
Just found your article while searching information about; Intuition vs Leading. While in a conversation I suggested I was “lead” not to walk the same path on the way home. My companion said, “Was it your intuition that spoke to you?” In my opinion I see my intuition and my leadings as different. It was difficult for me to explain the difference to her. I appreciate your articulation of intuition in this article. I would be interested in knowing if you feel there is a difference between intuition and leading. For me a “leading” is almost as if you know something is going to happen before it happens but you have no way of know in advance or of checking it out in advance and you don’t know what is going to happen and you don’t even think of wondering if something is going to happen. You simply know you want to do a certain thing (because it is presented to you in knowing or leading) and you chose to do it.
Just a note of clarity, the empath and the intuitive are not the same, you have some crossovers here. These two neither operate the same way, nor express it in the same way. A police officer and a psychic are classic intuitives but not empaths. A seer and a dreamer are empaths but not intuitives. Dreamtime can only be accessed by a fully enlightened human being, but dreams and dreaming can be done by every. There is much more of course but great job and blessings.
I am 71 and have always almost feared my intuition. I finally realized it is not so unusual. It came to me that it is more than physical and mental. It is actually a process,a way of thinking and physically knowing beyond doubt. We all collect info. in many ways. Some collect more and store it. Somehow we process the info. and instinctively know all possible results. It is then that the brain, gut ,and senses kick in all at once and we “know” and react or speak or write. That is the best understanding I have of intuition.
It seldom fails me and I share it.
I needed to find this today. Thank you. I always enjoy reading your posts.
I’m going to share this one, my intuition tells me others need to read this too.
Thanks Shelly! And I always enjoy yours. I’m pleased this one found it’s way to you.
How can I use my intuition when am in negative mood?
Intuition or inner feelings, I call it dance spirit. It seems one and the same. It is about listening to our body’s reaction! Right?
Absolutely. It’s about listening to our body’s reaction and the thoughts that whisper. (And I love the name dance spirit!)
Hi Karen,
It is so interesting to see that we are on the same page, and can agree on it, even though the vocabulary is a bit different.
I find that 7 of the 9 ways you are showing on how to tap into our intuition are truly our dance spirit legacy. I really enjoy the article and appreciate the insights about our dreams and our brains process, and being deliberate about the people we hang on to.
Thanks !
It was good and informative1
I just found this website. I believe it will be a great resource for my readers. Thank you!
So you will know ….. I give credit to all websites with clicks on the pictures and verbiage. So, each time I find something I believe my readers will like, then I refer them to your site to complete reading.
Thank you! Here is the link to the content share guidelines, but it sounds as though you have it covered https://www.heysigmund.com/content-share-guidelines/. I’m very grateful to you for sharing the articles!
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karenyoung_heysigmund
Boundaries are about what WE do to preserve physical safety, relational safety, and values. They aren’t about punishment. They’re the consequences that make sense as a way to put everything right again and restore calm and safety.
When someone is in the midst of big feelings or big behaviour, they (as with all of us when we’re steamy) have limited capacity to lead the situation into a better place.
Because of this, rather than focusing on what we need them to do, shift the focus on what we can do to lead back to calm.
This might sound like:
The rule (what we want them to do): Phones go in the basket at 5pm.
The boundary (what we do when the rule is broken), with love and leadership: ‘I can see you’re having trouble letting go of your phone. That’s okay - I’m just going to sit beside you until you’re ready. Take your time. You’re not in trouble. I’ll just stay here and watch over your shoulder until you’re done.’
Or …
‘I can see this phones in the basket process is dragging out and chewing into our night when we start it at 5pm. If that keeps happening I’ll be starting this process at 4pm instead of 5pm.’
And if there’s a bit of spice in their response, part of being a reliable, sturdy leader is also being able to lead them through that. Even if on the inside you feel like you’re about to explode 🤯 (we’ve all been there), the posture is ‘I can handle this, and I can handle you.’ This might sound like,
‘Yep you’re probably going to have a bit to say about it. That’s okay - I don’t need you to agree with me. I know it’s annoying - and it’s happening.’
‘I won’t listen when you’re speaking to me like this. Take your time though. Get it out of you and then we can get on with the evening.’
Then, when the spicy has gone, that’s the time to talk about what’s happened. ‘You’re such a great kid. I know you know it’s not okay to talk to me like that. How are we going to put this right? Let’s yet 5pm again tomorrow and see how we go. If it causes trouble we’ll start earlier. I actually think we’ll be okay though.’♥️
Nov 10
karenyoung_heysigmund
So ready to get started with ‘Hey Little Warrior’ in Melbourne. This is my fourth time this year presenting this workshop in Melbourne and we sell out every time.
So what do we do here?! We dive into how to support young children with anxiety. It’s my favourite thing to talk about. I love it. Even more than whether or not I want dessert. We talk about new ways to work with anxiety in littles so they can feel braver and bigger in the presence of it. This workshop is loaded with practical strategies. I love presenting this workshop.
(And yes - always yes to dessert. As if I would ever skip the most important meal of the day. Pffftt.)
@compass_australia
Oct 27
karenyoung_heysigmund
They’re often called sensory preferences, but they’re sensory needs.
In our adult worlds we can move our bodies and ourselves to seek regulation. If we don’t like noise we’re less likely to be DJs for example. If we don’t love heights we’re less likely to be pilots or skydivers. If we feel overwhelmed, we can step outside, go into an office, go to the bathroom, or pop on headphones for a break. If we need to move, we can stand, walk to get a tea. At school, this is so much harder.
When bodies don’t feel safe, there will be anxiety. This will potentially drive fight (anger, tantrums), flight (avoidance, running away, movement), or shutdown (in quiet distress and can’t learn).
These are physiological issues NOT behavioural ones.
Whenever we can, we need to support physiological safety by accommodating sensory needs AND support brave behaviour. What’s tricky is disentangling anxiety driven by unmet sensory needs, from anxiety driven by brave behaviour.
The way through is to support their physiological needs, then move them towards brave behaviour.
Schools want to support this. They want all kids to be happy and the best they can be, but there will be a limit on their capacity to support this - not because they don’t want to, but because of a scarcity of resources.
There will often be many children with different physiological needs. Outside school there is nowhere else that has to accommodate so many individual needs, because as adults we won’t be drawn to environments that don’t feel okay. In contrast, school requires all kids to attend and stay regulated in the one environment.
For now, we don’t have a lot of options. Yes there are schools outside mainstream, and yes there is home school, but these options aren’t available to everyone.
So, until mainstream schools are supported with the resources (staff, spaces, small classes, less demand on curriculum … and the list goes on), what can we do?
- Help school with specific ways to support your child’s physiology while being mindful that teachers are also attending to the needs of 25+ other nervous systems. But be specific.
- Limit the list. Make this a ‘bare minimum needs’ list, not a ‘preferences’ one.♥️
Oct 20
karenyoung_heysigmund
Brave often doesn’t feel like ‘brave’. Most often, it feels like anxiety. If there is something brave, important, new, hard, there will always be anxiety right behind it. It’s the feeling of anxiety that makes it something brave - and brave is different for everyone.♥️
#anxietyawareness #childanxiety #anxietysupport #anxietyinkids #parent #positiveparenting
Oct 18
karenyoung_heysigmund
Recently I chatted with Sharon from the ADHD Families Podcast. I loved this chat. We took a dive into anxiety and ADHD, including anxiety at school and some strategies for schools and parents to support kiddos with anxiety and ADHD. Listen to the full episode
here https://www.thefunctionalfamily.com/podcasts/adhd-families-podcast
thefunctionalfamily
Oct 16
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